laundering divinity

This refuge does not come cheaply

None ever do

The deity that require palms upraised

claims this is towards some unseen nuturing

There are no white horses here

The grazing ground is barren

Here ashes have settled

and my skin is left to its cold marble finish

Polish me then

with those beggared beliefs

My hope is my weakest link

and moves through me like a predator

breaking the sterility of my thoughts

with one bright fruit

I am imperiled though all over again

What strange sighs would move the heart then

Evermore a sinner

with celebration moving forward

remorse to bring all

closer to an end

blue jean baby….

Jeans…easy breezy, dress them up, dress them down, durable, comfortable, just right, and just wrong, mostly, for the environment.

Cotton should be a great fabric to wear in you’re interested in both comfort and climate concerns. It is used in nearly half of developed textiles and employs about 7% of the population of developing nations to produce it according the WWF. 713 gallons of water go into making one, just one T-shirt. I don’t know about you, but t-shirts form a large part of my wardrobe. Ever hear of the Aral Sea? It’s mostly gone now but it used to be the world’s fourth largest lake. Soviet Engineers decided to divert it’s waters in order to grow cotton in arid regions. Today the lake has split itself into two and is a 10th of it’s former size.

If you aren’t buying organic cotton, then you’re also supporting a huge pesticide/fertilizer industry. Cotton is the crop that uses the most pesticides, dangerous neurotoxin. Most are known or probable carcinogens. And yes, these residues can be found in the finished product of many cottons. Next to your skin.

Jeans, or denim, have additional climate complications….that lovely shade of indigo, possibly additionally acid washed, bleached, distressed, or otherwise ‘treated”. Indigo dye used is now mainly synthetically produced from petroleum and oil byproducts primarily in China and India. Again huge amounts of water are also used in the dyeing process along with a toxic chemical cocktail, the sludge of which is often simply dumped into local waters.

The dangers to the environment, obvious as they are are only one aspect of this “fast fashion”. It doesn’t address the health of the workers involved in the production of jeans and t-shirts, or their working conditions. Around 450 million pairs of jeans are sold in the U.S. alone. The manufacture of denim and cheap cotton isn’t going to stop but certainly we can influence it’s direction by choosing to buy differently. Yes, your t-shirt and your jeans are gonna cost more by choosing ethically but cost can no longer be the only consideration when you get dressed in the morning.

Bread and circuses

One of my goals this week is to make bread. When I lived in Europe, I enjoyed all kinds of bread. I often walked to the bakery in the morning to buy a baguette or some soft seeded bread for breakfast. In the states, or at least where I currently live this is an impossibility and the bread I do eat often leaves me feeling bloated. I don’t buy white wonder, or any of its cousins, but try to buy bakery bread from the grocery store. When I was growing up, bread was often on a side plate at meals and considered a staple. No one I knew had celiac or gluten sensitivity. Now nearly everyone I know has some kind of sensitivity to wheat/gluten. I found I too was experiencing issues after an elimination diet and reintroduction of bread and pasta to my diet- both foods I enjoy eating but seem to leave me with a inflammatory response of achy joints and bloated gut.

Wheat and its production in the US has changed dramatically.

In order to eat grain, it must be milled or ground. This used to be done with stone rollers – think pestle and mortar type of action. Then around the 1870’s along came the steel roller mill. Instead of just mashing everything all together, the new milling process allowed for more separation of the components of the grain, creating a popular white flour. Clearly this was much more efficient at producing flour quickly and it became the new standard all over. In the 940’s bread became “enriched”, adding back in synthetic vitamins B and sometimes the bran, versus the germ for wheat styled breads.

Besides production methods, the wheat grown in the US has also dramatically changed being hybridized many times over to increase disease resistance and production ease and amount.

Ever hear of Norman Borlaug? Or the Green Revolution?

After World War II, there was a huge push to increase agricultural production. Much of the world had experienced severe economic depressions. There were and had been ideological differences that were magnified by agricultural hardships. Think of the Great Depression in the US (1929-39; the dust bowl years 1930-36; WW II 1939-45) This wasn’t a singular American event. Germany’s depression began too in 1929. The Great Depression affected all capitalistic economies to different degrees, but the peace reparations demanded of Germany by Europe caused even more hardship.

The Green Revolution was a movement that began in the 1950’s and through the 60’s …people worried about overpopulation and the possibility of World War III due to the intense political differences of governments (Cold War era; Korean War 1950; Great Chinese Famine 1959-61; Vietnam War 1955; Bay of Pigs 1961…etc). The Green Revolution sought to increase agricultural production as a response to these worries. They succeeded via modified seed, use of new pesticides, synthetic fertilizers, expansive irrigation projects. The Ford Foundation and the Rockefeller Foundations were heavily involved. The simplistic hoped for result was food security and thus peace.

I don’t wish to get too involved in the histories and the politics, but as a unforeseen outcome the lack of diversity in agriculture is a negative. So back to my goal of making some bread this week. I plan to use a flour made from Einkorn wheat. My hope is to enjoy some bread without any reaction to it. Einkorn is considered an “ancient” wheat, thought to one of the first domesticated plants. It is considered to be low yielding (especially considered against “modern” wheat) but it is also able to grow in less than perfect areas. It is not gluten free- so it isn’t suitable for those with celiac disease, but does have more protein and other vitamins. It’s gluten makeup though is very different from modern hybrid wheat. I’m assuming it will taste different as well- perhaps heavier. I’ll let you know how it goes. Feel free to share your experiences and recipes….


It’s the last days of 2013, and basically the year has been a blur.  Even as the season winds itself down, I am aware of only the periphery…lights on houses, an occasional holiday song over the radio turned low as I drive over to Tremont.  I think sometimes, I should be making a better effort at being “in the season”…but mostly, I am just happy enough to mark off one more day off the calendar.  Hospice sucks.  I know that my Grandfather has lived a long life and he isn’t in any particular pain.  Its just this waiting. Watching him get smaller every day, a bit more guant.  His wrinkles have turned themselves inside out, smoothed by the loss of underlying structure.  He has no strength to feed himself any longer.  I hold the straw near his mouth so he can drink and even sucking down the thickened water now seems to be a trial for him.  When he tries to talk, I bend over and wait as the stuggling words emerge, muted and torn.  We are both becoming ghosts – only parts of our living are being expressed….I want to feel but emotions push me over boundaries where I am free falling alone and full of fear, so I manage.  I watch him as he manages.  Image

about bogieface….

In Turkey, cats are favored because they were said to be favored by Mohammed.  I don’t know if that matters much to cats at all since they almost always seem to be entirely self possessed, and completely self confident.  Bogie, or Booger, or Bogey, or Bogieface was named at first after Humphrey Bogart, the actor.  After a trip to the vet, it was discovered he was a she but the name stuck after all.